Etiquette Analysis: Introductions

The etiquette of introductions is covered in depth in the majority of my etiquette books. There were so many nuances that are rarely used today and with good reason. It’s a lot to learn, remember and implement! The following section mainly humored me but it does highlight the gendered differences prevalent in traditional etiquette.

“When gentlemen are introduced to each other, they always shake hands. When a gentleman is introduced to a lady, she generally smiles, bows slightly, and says, ‘How do you!’ Strictly speaking, it is her place to offer her hand or not, as she chooses; but if he puts out his hand, she of course gives him hers. Nothing could be more ill-bred than to treat any spontaneous friendliness curtly.” Emily Post (1945), Etiquette, 9.

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Obviously, women are not bowing to men and I’m grateful we have left that in the past. My opinion on introductions is that we should shake hands in all professional settings (of course - COVID pending). Even if we have previously met or are friendly with each other, business acquaintances should shake hands, never hug. Outside of work, when I meet someone for the first time, I always offer a handshake. A hug or a kiss on the cheek is reserved for friends only.

However, I do agree that there is nothing “more ill-bred than to treat any spontaneous friendliness curtly.” Above all else, always be kind and if someone bows to you, don’t make it weird. Just roll with it.